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Enver Hoxha invited to the Grida Duma: I was not a dictator!
2026-05-15 00:24:14 / POLITIKË
In a shocking turn of events that has left historians speechless, former communist leader Enver Hoxha appeared this evening in Grida Duma's studio for an exclusive "face to face" interview.
Dressed in a precisely tailored gray suit and with slicked-back hair that defied the laws of physics and mortality, Hoxha sat across from Duma, who began the conversation with a 12-minute introduction full of existential metaphors about "the inevitability of returning light to the darkness of collective memory."
"Comrade Enver," Grida began with that penetrating gaze of hers, "many people call you a dictator. How do you feel about this labeling in the context of an Albania that today 'checks in' in Dubai?"
Hoxha, after taking a sip of water, which the staff made sure was checked by the Sigurimi, smiled with a creepy kindness.
"Grida, thank you for the question, but the word 'dictator' is simply a linguistic construct of American imperialism," Hoxha said. "I was not a dictator. I was simply a project manager with a very specific vision. Let's say I had a slightly... authoritarian management style. When the team didn't achieve its objectives, there were consequences. Isn't that also the case in today's corporations?"
Duma interrupted by quoting a nonsensical line from Nietzsche, but Hoxha continued:
"Prisons? No, no. They were 'forced collaboration spaces'. Albania's isolation? It was simply an early 'social media detox' on a national scale. We were 'eco-friendly' before it was fashionable; we didn't have cars, we only ate organic food and we built 700,000 bunkers as a form of the 'tiny house movement' for emergencies."
During the interview, Hoxha also complained about the prices of apartments in Tirana, noting that in his time "everyone had a house, even though they probably had to share a toilet with two other families and report to the neighborhood what they were cooking."
When asked about the executions of his closest associates, Hoxha simply shrugged: "It was a period of high staff turnover. You can't make an omelette without breaking a few eggs... or without shooting the entire Politburo." /Taken from the "Ministry of Justice" blog
Happening now...
Molotov cocktail on Saturday, shopping on Thursday!
Nga Bato Kosova
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